Out of practice after two Covid Christmasses? Expert tips to get back in the festive spirit

This is the first Christmas since 2020 that we haven’t had Covid restrictions in place (Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

Almost three years on from when Covid hit the UK, we’re now able to mix socially, travel, and generally go about our business like we did in the before times.

In the rush to bring life back to ‘normal’, though, it’s important to be mindful of just how different things have been since the first lockdown began.

Christmas is one of the things that dramatically changed during the pandemic, with restrictions and tier levels keeping loved ones apart during the previous two festive seasons.

When the alternative was potentially infecting elderly relatives and vulnerable friends, staying home was a small price to pay for many. But worthwhile or not, it’s wreaked havoc on our collective cheer levels.

A study by parenting app Peanut found that 70% of women feel significantly lonelier since the pandemic, while a survey by Goodrays revealed that Covid is the third biggest stress point for Brits this Christmas, with 23% of us worried about getting sick on the big day.

The festive season has long been a source of social pressure for many, with the cost of living crisis compounding worries and leaving many fearing 2023’s arrival instead of welcoming in the New Year.

If you’re struggling to find that Christmassy feeling – or to snap back to celebrating when you’re out of practice – you’re not alone.

But anxiety and low mood don’t need to be your joy-thieving Grinch.

Rather than letting your spirits be further dampened, there are a number of ways to reinvigorate your Christmas spirit.

Money worries, winter woes, and pressure to have fun can affect your mood (Picture: Getty Images)

According to Dr Bryony Henderson, Lead GP at digital healthcare provider Livi, it’s a good idea to set out what an enjoyable Christmas means for you. This will give you a chance to push back when things get too much.

She tells Metro.co.uk: ‘Just because you may feel obliged to be extra sociable, it doesn’t mean you have to spend time with absolutely everyone you know and love.  

‘If you’re worried about family pressure or uncomfortable situations, try putting boundaries in place. Families can be invasive or cast shame or guilt. You don’t have to justify your decision on how you spend your time. Allow yourself to be honest and try to communicate that.’

When it comes to alleviating strain in relationships, Sara Davison, best known as The Divorce Coach, says: ‘Try and pinpoint any difficult demands and points of strain in advance and make compromises where needed that you are both comfortable with.’

Whether single or in a couple, knowing what’s expected of you – and making clear what you expect from loved ones – can take the tension out of Christmas.

What this looks like will be different from person to person: perhaps you’d benefit from arriving/leaving earlier than other guests, sitting out of raucous games that trigger panic, or setting a budget for gifts to avoid ambiguity over spending.

Sara adds: ‘Feel free to ask a guest to help out with the cooking or looking after the kids so you’re not left feeling resentful.

‘If you know certain people don’t get on, it’s also a good idea to speak to them beforehand and explain to them that it’s important for everyone to make the effort to have a harmonious day.’

A problem shared is a problem halved (Picture: Getty Images)

Despite meticulous planning, though, our brains don’t always play ball. Anxiety should be dealt with long-term, but in the midst of a panic attack you need urgent solutions.

‘With many sociable events happening, including office Christmas parties and family gatherings, it may be particularly challenging for some,’ says Dr Bryony.

‘Although it’s important to talk to a doctor or psychologist about your anxiety, there are a number of tools you can use to cope in the moment when your anxiety feels overwhelming.’

She recommends this breathing technique:

Sit or lie down comfortably 

Exhale completely 

Gently and slowly inhale through your nose for the count of four

Gently exhale through your mouth for the count of four 

Pause and hold for the count of four

As you breathe, imagine your breath moving around the image of a square 

Repeat for 1 or 2 minutes, or until you feel calmer 

The traditional Christmas walk may help, as exercise triggers the release of endorphins that enhance emotional wellbeing. Plus, it’s a good excuse to regroup when things get too much.

‘If you do find yourself simmering, take some deep breaths or try and get out for a walk to clear your head,’ says Sara. ‘Above all, recognise that people are stressed and don’t take the bait.’

Heading outside can improve your mood too – especially if you’re dealing with seasonal depression.

‘During the festive season and winter months, a lack of sunlight has shown a correlation with symptoms of seasonal affective disorder (SAD) in some people,’ explains Dr Bryony. ‘This is a type of recurring low mood with a seasonal pattern.’

She advises: ‘Try to get as much daylight as possible. Even a short daily walk can be beneficial. Natural light is the most important cue for maintaining circadian rhythms (the body’s natural sleep/wake cycle).

‘If you’re worried about your symptoms contact a doctor to discuss your options when it comes to getting help for low mood or depression.’

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It’s unrealistic to expect mental health improvements based on the magic of Christmas alone. Idealising a ‘perfect’ day is likely to backfire, leaving you disappointed if the reality doesn’t match your high standards.

That said, ‘faking it until you make it’ with a cheery mindset may get things off on the right foot.

‘Making a conscious effort to stay positive and calm is a simple but incredibly effective way to avoid tension building up,’ says Sara. ‘Good vibes are contagious.’

And if all else fails, take a step back and give yourself some perspective. Loved ones won’t judge you for not being the life and soul of the party, and may even be experiencing the same feelings.

Communicating what’s troubling you ensures you won’t seem standoffish, and opens up conversations so people can share their problems too – you could even bond over your shared lack of merriment.

So whether you’re raring to go or numb to the frivolity, reaching out is the way forward. The turkey, the gifts, the decorations; none of it matters more than connection with your nearest and dearest.

Forget the add-ons and remember your presence is the real present to those that care about you. Cut yourself some slack and it’ll be Boxing Day in no time.

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