30 days’ abstinence isn’t easy (Picture: Getty)
Since the dawn of time, man has tried to curb the human urge to practice onanism.
John Harvey Kellogg invented corn flakes with the aim of boring people into abstinence, while Freud cited the ‘disease of masturbation’ in his work, associating it with addictive substances.
Even today, boys are told the urban legend that they’ll go blind if they overdo it, creating a sense of fear, shame, and taboo around masturbation.
This is likely part of why the No Nut November challenge has become so pervasive. It’s also why we’re proposing a different strategy: a mastur-break.
Created in 2011, No Nut November involves participants abstaining from all forms of sex for 30 days. The main (and only) goal is to avoid ‘busting a nut’ – also known as ejaculating – throughout the month, which means staying away from partners, porn, or self-pleasure.
Although NNN originally began as a joke, it’s picked up speed in recent years, with the Reddit community /r/NoNutNovember now standing at 137,000 members, a massive jump from the 16,500 subscribers it counted in November 2018.
The subreddit’s description claims that some who take part ‘do it just for the memes, while others do it for actual self-improvement.’
What is a mastur-break
A mastur-break is for those who want to practice abstinence but can’t or don’t want to avoid sex for a whole month.
Rather than spending your November totally nut-free, a mastur-break doesn’t involve a set time limit. Instead, you commit to temperance and let your instincts help decide when to stop.
When or if you do restart, you haven’t ‘failed’ – guilt and shame are not tied to your ability to delay gratification here.
There’s no right or wrong way to have a mastur-break, so it’s a pressure-free way to put the focus on other aspects of your life, heighten anticipation for your next sexual encounter, or just test out celibacy on a temporary basis.
But is a month-long masturbation ban improving anything? Or is it a futile exercise in self-flagellation that plays right into society’s prudish attitudes?
Whatever your reasons for donning a metaphorical chastity belt, we’re not here to judge. However, it’s worth asking yourself whether abstinence is getting to the root of your issues, as well as whether it needs to fit an arbitrary time limit.
Sexologist Dr Jess O’Reilly says there are a few reasons someone might take a break from sex (with themselves or a partner). She tells Metro.co.uk:
‘You want to focus on other areas of your life (e.g. work, spiritual growth, recovery, parenting); some people say it improves their focus (and of course, the opposite is true for others — sex offers stress relief that helps them to focus)You might abstain for the fun of it (to create anticipation, desire and enhanced pleasure when you eventually get back to it)You might abstain from sex to work on another area of your relationship or focus on other types of connection -some people feel as though they have more energy when they take a break from sex (and of course, others are energized by sex)’
It’s a matter of different strokes for different folks, as Dr Jess – who’s working with Superdrug Online Doctor to reduce stigma around sexual health – stresses that ‘there are no universally negative (or positive) effects from abstaining from sex’.
While Dr Jess says there’s nothing wrong with taking time out from pursuits of the flesh, she adds: ‘If abstinence is tied to pressure, shame, manipulation or abuse, you’ll likely want to look at the source of the problem as the associated stress can have adverse outcomes.’
In these situations, it’s best to speak to a medical professional or seek a qualified therapist to help you work through your problems. A sex ban here is merely a sticking plaster.
If these don’t apply to you, ask yourself whether No Nut November is the right way to address your needs.
There’s crossover between this campaign and the ‘incel’ subculture, with the archetypal participant seeming to be young men who regularly watch porn. There’s no official diagnosis of masturbation addiction, but (among the memes) a number of online community members talk about struggling to kick the habit.
For these people, a sexual hiatus can be beneficial – but don’t expect it to transform your life.
Going through tissues like they’re going out of fashion? It might be mastur-break time (Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
Proponents of No Nut November and similar movements like NoFap, much like the Puritans of days gone by, claim ‘semen retention’ is good for a person’s physical and mental health.
While there is evidence that sleep and concentration can be improved by abstinence, most purported benefits are unsupported by research.
It’s also claimed that watching porn or regularly masturbating can lead to erectile dysfunction, when in fact, studies show that it actually does the opposite.
Essentially, since forgoing pleasure won’t turn you into a tantric superhero, there’s no need to be too restrictive when doing so.
More: Lifestyle
Relationship Therapist Callisto Adams tells Metro.co.uk: ‘Abstinence can be a healthy practice in shorter or not-limited periods.
‘Abstaining for a few days or weeks is a much more manageable and healthier approach. It will serve to give you sense of fulfilment without becoming a painful process impacting other areas of your life.’
This can take your challenge from a personal Everest to a climax (or lack of one) that’s far less daunting.
Callisto adds that, if you’re taking a mastur-break to improve your sexual experience ahead of a big date, ‘you should try abstaining for the week leading up to seeing your partner.’
As long as you aren’t expecting to fix all your problems, time out from me-time could add an interesting new twist to your bedroom exploits.
Above all, try to remember that sex is neither a punishment nor a reward, and that balance is a key aspect of every part of life.
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A month-long sexual hiatus isn’t for the fainthearted.
