Britney Spears has told her truth – these are the women who helped her along the way (Picture: GETTY / REX)
If The Woman in Me – Britney Spears’ new memoir, released today – tells us anything about her life, it’s that she’s been wronged by many men. But read between the headlines, and there are some key women who have championed her when no one else did.
From her father who forced her into a thirteen-year long conservatorship, clipping all her wings and stripping Britney of her ‘womanhood’, to the male paparazzi who hounded her for much of her life, and the ‘older men’ who leered at her in the audience of her shows, to Justin Timberlake lapping up his ‘golden boy’ persona and demonising her in the wake of their split: men have not been Britney’s friend.
That’s aside from a few tender moments in her memoir, one of which describes the time when she spent months alone in a New York apartment after splitting with Justin, and Robin Williams made her laugh in an elevator. Or, when Sir Elton John – who she described as a ‘beautiful man on all levels’ was ‘kind’ to her on recording their duet, Hold Me Closer.
But, apart from that? Paris Hilton, Oprah Winfrey, and Madonna were among the people who rallied to her side during her darkest hours.
Read the latest Britney Spears news in our The Woman In Me release live blog
Today is surely some sort of small fist-pump moment for women, as many around the country will be squeezing a lunchtime visit to WHSmith to get their hands on the 41-year-old Toxic hitmaker’s much-anticipated story – from her perspective, for once.
‘She’s all of us,’ wrote one Twitter/X user this morning in response to a video of actor Emma Roberts tearing open a package to reveal the now-familiar black and pink cover of The Woman in Me. And that she is.
Britney was inspired by many women in her life (Picture: Jeremy Bembaron/Sygma/Sygma via Getty Images)
‘I was a little girl with big dreams. I wanted to be a star like Madonna, Dolly Parton, or Whitney Houston,’ Britney wrote at the beginning of her memoir.
‘I had simpler dreams to,’ she continued. ‘I want my dad to stop drinking. I want my mom to stop yelling. I want everyone to be okay.’
It becomes clear throughout the book there are a few famous women who have guided Britney through her life when all felt lost. Here is a run down of who those women are, and what they did for Britney in her time of need, keeping alive The Woman in Her.
Paris Hilton
‘One of the people who was kindest to me when I really needed kindness was Paris Hilton,’ Britney wrote, talking of a time after her split from ex-husband Kevin Federline in 2006.
Britney was going through a custody battle over their two sons; Sean Preston, 18, and Jayden James, 17 – who she dedicated the memoir to, and dubbed the ‘loves of [her] life.’
Paris Hilton took Britney under her wing and taught her how to have fun again (Picture: Chris Polk/FilmMagic)
While much of America ‘dismissed Paris as a party girl’, Britney found her ‘elegant’ with her red carpet ease, and ‘arched eyebrow’ whenever someone was ‘mean’.
‘She saw that I had babies and that I was suffering from the breakup, and I think she felt sorry for me. She came over to my house, and she helped me out so much. She was just so sweet to me,’ the popstar explained.
Britney went on to explain how it felt like she hadn’t been treated like this in a long while, and Paris taught her to ‘have fun’ again.
‘With Paris, I went through my party stage,’ she remembered – although this wasn’t as ‘wild’ as the media storm suggested.
Madonna
In New York, post-Justin, Britney ‘fell off the face of the earth’ and didn’t get outside.
‘One of my few visitors during that strange, surreal time was Madonna,’ Britney wrote, also touching on the heartwarming run in she had with the late Mrs Doubtfire actor during this time.
Back to Madonna. Britney explained how she walked into her apartment, and ‘immediately’ owned the room.
‘I remember thinking, its Madonna’s room now,’ recalled Britney. ‘Stunningly beautiful, she exuded power and confidence. She walked straight to the window, looked out, and said; “Nice view.”‘
In this shadowy time, Britney credited Madonna’s ‘supreme confidence’ for helping her see her situation with ‘fresh clarity’.
Britney wished she had a role model like Madonna growing up (Picture:Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic)
Their MTV Awards kiss in 2003 was talked about for years (Picture: Chris Polk/FilmMagic)
‘I think she probably had some intuitive sense of what I was going through,’ wrote Britney, who admitted she needed guidance amid her confusion, and Madonna tried to ‘mentor’ her.
”At one point she did a red-string ceremony with me to initiate me into the Kabbalah and she gave me a trunk full of Zohar books to pray with,’ Britney explained.
On the base of Britney’s neck, she got the word tattooed – meaning one of the 72 names of God.
Britney wishes she’d had a role model like Madonna growing up. ‘She had endured so much sexism and bullying,’ noted Britney, ‘but she always overcame it.’
Out of all the women who influenced Britney, it appears Madonna made a huge impact (Picture: Jason Merritt/FilmMagic)
They decided to perform together at the VMAs. Everytime they rehearsed it, they did an ‘air kiss’ – and so the famous big kiss at the end of their performance at the MTV awards of 2003 happened.
‘A lot was made of that kiss,’ she recalled. ‘Oprah asked Madonna about it. The kiss was treated as a huge cultural moment.’
They then collaborated on Me Against the Music, and Britney was ‘in awe’ of how the Hung Up hitmaker would never ‘compromise her vision’.
‘She demanded power, and she got power,’ recalled Britney, remembering what a lesson her time with the star was.
Oprah Winfrey
During her fleeting run-in with Oprah Winfrey, on the famed interviewer’s show, Britney had an aha-moment.
Her whole life, Britney had been sexualised. ‘All some reporters could think to ask me was whether or not my breasts were real (they were, actually) and whether or not my hymen were in tact,’ she recalled.
So Britney ‘appreciated it’ when Oprah gave her some strong words of wisdom.
‘I appreciated it when Oprah told me on her show that my sexuality was no one else’s business and that when it came to virginity,’ Britney said. ‘You don’t need a world announcement if you change your mind,’ the star recalled Oprah saying.
Mariah Carey
Mariah Carey isn’t a star Britney feels she can get on a first name basis with, even though she’s met the Touch My Body star.
While Britney used to shoot ‘Mariah Carey videos’ in her backyard as a child, at one awards show, the Toxic singer knocked on her dressing room door.
On the other side was a ‘beautiful otherworldly light’, remembered Britney, explaining how Mariah seemed to be the first person to discover ring lights.
Britney met Mariah Carey in her dressing room once, and will never forget it (Picture: Bob King/Redferns)
Britney asked for a photo. ‘Come here, darling,’ responded Mariah, who – turning her body to flatter it in the light – kept repeating: ‘My good side, girl, my good side, girl.’
‘I did everything Mariah Carey told me to do and we took the photo. Of course she was completely right about everything – the photo looked incredible,’ remembered Britney.
Britney won an award that night. ‘But I couldn’t tell you what it was,’ she admitted. ‘The perfect photo with Mariah Carey – that was the real prize.’
Donatella Versace
Roll back to 2002. Britney is heartbroken after breaking up with Justin Timberlake, and couldn’t speak ‘for months.’ She’s lost a lot; as she even considered the SexyBack hitmaker’s family as the closest thing to a ‘real, loving family [she] had’.
In September of that year, to ‘get [her] confidence back’ Britney visited fashion designer Donatella Versace in Milan.
‘That trip invigorated me,’ remembered Britney. ‘It reminded me that there was still fun to be had in the world.’
Britney leant on Donatella Versace after her breakup with Justin, visiting her in Milan (Picture: Franco Origlia/Getty Images)
Donatella was a ‘dynamic host’ who threw brilliant parties, remembered Britney, and they ‘drank amazing wine and ate amazing food’ while the designer dressed her in a ‘beautiful sparkly rainbow dress’.
When Britney was ‘supposed to sing’ but didn’t feel like it, Donatella told her to ‘take it easy’ – a far (and far gentler) cry away from what she would experience under her conservatorship six years later.
The women not in the public eye
While Britney was forced into her crippling conservatorship under her father – and into hospital ‘against [her] will’ – her mother was ‘writing a memoir’.
‘When I made a wrong move, it was like my mother wasn’t concerned,’ wrote Britney, who confessed to being in the ‘darkest’ time of her life. ‘She would share my every mistake on television, promoting her book,’ she added.
Britney’s mother aside, Britney came across several women in her personal life who inspired her.
‘I loved the women in my family,’ Britney wrote. Her Aunt Sandra, who sadly died in 2007 after a ‘long and brutal struggle’ with ovarian cancer, was like her ‘second mother’.
Britney dreamt of being a star – but also just wanted everyone to ‘be okay’ (Photo by James Devaney/WireImage)
‘By my Aunt Sandra’s grave at the funeral, I cried l harder than I ever had,’ she said.
Her great-grandmother, Lexie Pierce was ‘wicked beautiful’, remembered Britney.
‘She was badass, more and more so as she got older, Britney explained, describing her relationship with Lexi as ‘very close’.
‘My most vivid and joyful memories of being a little girl are times spent with her,’ she said. They would have sleepovers – just the two of them – and she would raid Lexie’s makeup, and would get fed huge breakfasts.
‘I loved nothing more than drifting off to sleep by her side, smelling her face powder and perfume, listening as her breathing grew deep and regular,’ Britney said.
But one day when they were driving to rent a film, and Lexie hit another car. It wasn’t a bad crash, recalled the star, but Britney’s mother ‘got scared’ and banned her from hanging out at Lexie’s house.
‘It was a huge loss for me,’ remembered Britney. ‘I didn’t understand how being with someone I loved could be considered dangerous.’
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