We’ve all done at least one of these mistakes
Your date just came to an end and you’re already planning what to wear for the next one.
But the following days pass without so much as a text, and you never see or hear from them again.
So, what’s going on? Well, you could be making six key mistakes that are ruining your chances of a second date.
The is good news is, they’re easy to fix.
So, if you’ve got a first date this weekend, try this advice from matchmaker Siobhan Copeland to improve your chances.
Where should you go on a first date?
Coffee shops and restaurants are apparently the worst places for a first date. ‘I find restaurants a little too formal, and coffee shops are often overcrowded, so it feels uncomfortable to be meeting someone for the first time, queuing up for 10 minutes to get a hot drink, and then you may not even get a seat,’ says Siobhan.
Instead, chose a venue that is ‘comfortable, warm, relaxed and ideally booked in advance’. She also suggests a quirky activity, such as a glow-in-the-dark art class.
This will give you something to chat about without either of you going into interview mode and asking a bunch of questions.
What are the ickiest first date activities?
According to a poll of 2,000 Brits in August last year, escape rooms got the most votes when asked to pick the worst first date activity.
The top five worst activities include:
1. Escape rooms
2. A long walk
3. Open mic nights
4. Hiking
5. Karaoke
How should you greet the person on a first date?
First impressions are very important and to avoid starting the date on the wrong foot, Siobhan says that physical contact should be avoided.
‘For the first interaction I would avoid such close physical contact, if at the end of the night you are at ease with each other, you may want to end with a kiss on the cheek.
‘Read their body language and how close they have been towards you throughout the night. Are they making strong eye contact, do they lean towards you? At the start though, a smile, eye contact and an upbeat, “Hi nice to meet you” will do fine!’
What are the worst things you could say on a first date?
The key to having a fabulous first interaction with your date is to keep things fun and light.
There are some topics Siobhan says we should avoid: ‘Exes, anything that also makes you appear that you are of a negative mindset like complaining about your job, complaining about poor treatment from others.
‘It is not necessary to ask questions like why are you single or how long have you been single? Stick to feel-good topics – opening up someone’s relationship profile could make them upset – they could have recently come out of a tough break up and it’s taken them a lot of courage to start dating again.
‘Definitely avoid politics, having different opinions could end up in complete disaster.’
Siobhan suggests doing an activity instead of having a fancy dinner date (Picture: Getty Images)
How can you tell if they like you back?
The best way to share your interest in pursuing things further is by keeping a keen eye on their body language to gauge if this is reciprocated. And then simply say towards the end of the date that you’d like to meet up again.
‘Put it out there that you would like to meet again and gauge their response. If they seem pleased, try to book a second date on the first date by checking each other’s availability the following week.’
Siobhan, who owns the dating agency Cupid In The City, says to avoid texting the person too much in between dates – you’ll want to have stuff to talk about when you see each other again.
‘Once a week for early dating in the first month is about right, and not lots of texting in between. You could even make it clear you are not big on texting when you are first getting to know someone, you prefer to get to know each other when you are face to face.’
What are the best (and worst) days of the week for a first date?
Is Tuesday too boring? Is Friday a waste of a weekend night if the date’s a fail? And who can be bothered to go out on a Monday anyway?
While the dating app, Thursday, has some pretty clear feelings because it encourages singles to set dates up on – you guessed it – a Thursday, calling it the ‘day for dating’, leaving them the rest of the week to ‘spend time on you.’
The day of the week should aim for is hump day. Yep, Wednesday – or Thursday if the former doesn’t work out.
Dating expert for Match, Hayley Quinn, says some days are better than others.
She said that a successful first date is more likely in the middle of the week ‘Aim for a Wednesday or Thursday evening, or a Sunday brunch,’ she told Metro.co.uk.
‘Friday or Saturday nights are likely to be saved for socialising with friends and not seen as worth spending on a first date.
‘Mondays and Tuesdays are also out, as people usually won’t want a late night or to get out of their routine too early in the week.’
What are the worst foods to eat on a first date?
The garlic bread on the menu might be tempting but it’s best to save it until after the date. Onions are also something to be avoided to ensure your breath smells super fresh in case there’s a kiss.
‘Before you order nuts or shellfish, check if your date doesn’t have any allergies. I’d also recommend not eating anything that puts you at risk of making a mess, such as spaghetti and soups.
‘No one really wants to hear slurping on a first date meal and avoid foods like ribs where you might get food stuck in your teeth.
‘You don’t want your date to have to tell you about the spinach that’s been sitting in the front of your mouth after ten minutes of conversation, as let’s face it, they will be thinking less about what you are talking about and more about how to tell you.’
What is the worst food to have on a first date?
This may come as a massive surprise but McDonald’s was voted second worst place to go on a first date.
Tombola asked 11,000 of its players about the worst place for a first date and the fast food favourite came out in second place, with 13% of respondents saying the fast food joint was their idea of dating hell – despite the fact 46% of us have had a date there in the past.
Who should pay on a first date?
Siobhan says it’s always polite to ask when the bill arrives. ‘It doesn’t matter who says it first, but I would always approach with “how would you like us to handle the bill?” If one person insists that they will get it, then respond graciously and thank them for their generosity and kindness, that is enough.
‘You don’t need to then say, “Ok, I’ll get the next one.” It’s not about owing, it is about accepting someone wanting to court you effectively.’
These dating dos and don’ts sound obvious but we all do them.
