I should have died — her Christmas gift saved me

Deborah (L) and Kim (R) have a special bond (Picture: Ed Cunicelli Photographer)

It was a love of fitness that brought Kim Schadt, 46, and Deborah Calabro, 53, together in 2010.

Both members of the same gym, the pair would see each other a few times a week, exchanging a quick ‘hello’ and a coffee here and there.

That same year, Kim and Deborah, who live in New Jersey, USA, got paired together in a cross training class. But Kim, a nurse practitioner at a children’s hospital, immediately noticed something alarming about her partner.

‘Do you know that your eyes are yellow?’ she asked.

Deborah had already told Kim that she had colitis, and her doctor was monitoring her liver function.

The women bonded over their love of fitness (Picture: Supplied)

Kim tells Metro.co.uk: ‘I was on high alert. The white of her eye was so yellow, it was very pronounced.

‘She was very jaundice, and I when I saw her that day, I just knew something was very, very wrong.’

Just a week later, Deborah was diagnosed with primary sclerosing cholangitis, a chronic liver disease that slowly damages the bile ducts.

‘I was trying to lead a normal life,’ says Deborah. ‘But I was constantly in and out of hospital.

‘I had extreme fatigue, which affected me hugely. I got used to not feeling well. I got used to nodding off at work, looking gray.

‘I always got nose bleeds and my skin was itchy. I have vitiligo and that seemed to be getting worse too.’

Their surgeries were a success (Picture: Supplied)

But despite her health issues, the friendship between Kim and Deborah continued to blossom. ‘We would see each other three or four times a week.

‘We got on so well because we’re basically the same person – we’re both type A personalities and emotionally very in sync.

‘We’d go on long walks – they were like therapy – or go to the farmers’ market. Everything that our husbands don’t like doing!’ laughs Deborah.

But Deborah’s health continued to deteriorate. ‘In 2016, I suffered with a lot of infections which led to lots of trips to A&E.

‘I was due to go on big trip to Italy with my entire family, and the day before, the doctors told me it was too risky to go.

‘I spent the week with Kim instead!’

Deborah spent 9 days in hospital (Picture: Supplied)

But Deborah’s liver had lasted as long as it could, and by 2016, Kim says, they knew she was heading into the ‘transplant arena’.

‘I didn’t really know how it all worked,’ says Deborah. ‘I thought you just added your name to a list, and waited. I assumed the liver would come from a person who donated their organs after death.

‘But then, my doctor told me that my best bet for a transplant was from a live donor.’

Because the liver regenerates, it’s possible for liver donors to donate a portion of their livers. The remaining liver grows back almost to it’s original size, carrying out the same functions.

Deborah’s loved ones stepped up – both her sister and another friend offered – and so did Kim.

Kim says: ‘It was a no brainer, it never felt like a decision.

‘When someone that you love is dying, if there’s something you can do to save them, then you’re going to do it.’ Deborah described it as an ‘overwhelming’ offer and says Kim is ‘literally my angel.’

The matching process was a long one. Both her sister and friend were not suitable matches but Kim had hope. ‘I just knew it was going to be me,’ she says. ‘For months, we had to wait, and I just wanted them to hurry up and do it.

‘We weren’t like a normal recipient and donor – we went to every single appointment together.’

Finally, in December 2016, the friends got confirmation that Kim could donate a portion of her liver to Deborah.

They say that preparing to go into surgery just after Christmas, made their situation all the more poignant.

‘It’s already a nostalgic, reflective time of year,’ says Deborah. ‘So knowing what we were about to go through together made Christmas even more special.

‘It almost gave it more meaning. It was like the best Christmas gift she could ever give me.’

On the night before the surgery on January 12, 2017, the friends had a ‘rehearsal dinner’ – traditionally a meal the night before an American wedding – with their families.

When asked how they were feeling, Kim says: ‘What emotions weren’t we feeling?

‘We coped with our nerves through humour, and making light of the situation.’

The next day, the pair arrived at hospital with their husbands, wearing t-shirts that read: ‘It takes a village.’

The pair arrived to hospital in matching tops (Picture: Supplied)

‘We were in rooms side by side,’ says Deborah. ‘I cried when they wheeled me into theatre.’

The transplant was a success, and the next day, Kim was able to walk to Deborah’s bedside. ‘Not that I remember it, I was heavily sedated!’ Deborah laughs.

Kim spent a week in hospital, and Deborah was discharged two days later. ‘There was a lot of phone calls and comparing notes,’ says Deborah.

‘We went through it all together.

Deborah says it’s only now that she’s healthy – thanks to Kim – that she realised how unwell she really was.

‘I was blown away by how much better I felt,’ she says. ‘I looked back and realised how I was feeling was so far from normal.’

And, the transplant only strengthened their friendship.

‘We were close before but have been inseparable since. It’s a bond of a lifetime.,’ says Kim.

The pair went back to their beloved gym together just four weeks after surgery, where they ‘ran’ a 22 minute mile. They signed up for a 5k in the April – which they walked together, having not recovered quite enough to run it.

Kim got Deborah into running (Picture: Supplied)

As the first summer post-transplant approached, Deborah, who had always been a walker, picked up the running bug from Kim.

‘If a runner gal is going to give me a liver, I better start running,’ she said. The pair set their sets on the Philadelphia half marathon in November 2017.

Crossing the finish line together is one of Deborah’s most cherished memories with her friend. ‘It was a really special moment,’ she says.

Meanwhile, Kim began training for a full marathon. That autumn, less than a year after her transplant, she ran the Cascade Express Marathon in Washington – one of the fastest courses in the USA. She completed it in a staggeringly quick time of just 3:42:56.

‘I wanted to prove that you can come out of something like this better than when you went into it,’ she says.

The pair are fighting fit – and showing off their scars (Picture: Ralph Deal Photography)

Now, the pair continue to hit the gym, and run together, as often as possible. Every year on their ‘liver-versary’ they take the day off and do something fun just the two of them – this year, they plan on going to see a show.

‘Honestly, these days, the transplant doesn’t come up that often,’ says Kim.

‘I have no regrets. In the end, this is what life is all about, standing up for what you believe in and the people that you love.’

To learn more about live organ donation, visit Team Be More on Instagram.

Do you have a story to share?

Get in touch by emailing [email protected].

MORE : We hadn’t spoken for years — an overheard conversation in Topshop changed everything

MORE : My boyfriend was obsessed with his ex — then she emailed me

‘When someone that you love is dying, if there’s something you can do to save them, then you’re going to do it.’