‘I love it when my husband flirts with me’ (Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)
Welcome to How I Do It, the series in which we give you a seven-day sneak peek into the sex life of a stranger.
This week we hear from Hallie*, a 38-year-old mum-of-two from Liverpool who identifies as straight.
Hallie, a civil servant, has been with her husband, who she met at university, for 20 years, and despite being together for two decades, they still fancy the pants off each other (literally).
‘In the beginning we couldn’t kiss without it leading to sex,’ Hallie tells Metro.co.uk.
‘It’s still like that now – but for different reasons! With two lively kids around the house, we don’t get to kiss as often, so when we do, one thing always leads to another.’
Here, Hallie tells us how she balances motherhood with her sex life.
Monday
My husband, Dan*, and I realised a long time ago, that we need different things to get us in the mood.
Dan, typical guy, seems to be able to get turned on by the mere mention of sex. He can have sex anywhere, anytime – but I can’t be switched on like that. I need communication and time together before I can get in the mood.
For that reason, during the week, we don’t often have sex. But it’s still important to stay connected so we try to steal the odd kiss and cheeky feel here and there. I also think it’s important for the kids to see us being affectionate.
As I made dinner for everyone tonight, Dan grabbed my bum and we stole a snog. I love it when he flirts with me.
Tuesday
This morning, our youngest, Joe*, six, clambered into bed with us. Both Joe and his older sister, Frankie*, eight, haven’t quite got to the point where they respect personal space or privacy yet.
It was a gloomy morning, so it was still a bit dark in our bedroom – which I was pretty relieved about when Joe pulled a condom wrapper out from under the pillow!
‘Why is there a tomato sauce wrapper in your bed, Mum?’ he asked. Both Dan and I stifled giggles as we told him we’d been eating chips in bed.
We have age appropriate conversations with both of the kids about sex – but I was quite happy to avoid one so early in the morning!
Wednesday
Today, I got up super early to go to the gym while everyone else was still sleeping. After a sweaty work out, I got home and into the shower, just as Dan was getting out of bed.
The minute he clocked me taking off my Lycra gym clothes, I knew what he was thinking – and with the kids still in bed, I was more than happy to oblige.
I’m not always a huge fan of shower sex – I don’t feel like water adds anything to the equation, and no one wants to get soap in their eye while they’re trying to do their best work – but it’s rare we get an opportunity during the week, so I was all for it.
Gym, sex and shower all done before 7.30am – and they say women can’t have it all.
Thursday
Dan and I both work long days, and today we were like ships passing in the night.
I’ve never been one to monitor our sex life too closely, or keep tabs on how often we’re doing it. If it happens, it happens.
Today, the most we shared was a quick kiss here and there – and that’s fine by me.
Friday
We’ve been quite lucky recently as my niece has been happy to babysit the kids every now and then.
So tonight, Dan and I went out for dinner and drinks while she looked after them. We have a deal where the kids can sleep in our bed on a Friday and Saturday night. It’s part of a transition of co-sleeping since birth.
I love date nights. That time together, one on one, to be able to talk and interact is lovely – and even after all this time, Dan is one of my favourite people to spend time with.
When we got back, my niece went home and after a few cuddles, Dan and I ended up having sex on the couch – which was great.
With the kids sleeping in our bed, it always makes me laugh when people ask how or where we have sex – as if bed is the only place. We’ve learnt to get inventive!
Afterwards we went up to bed, it was a tight squeeze so I got in with the kids in our bed, while Dan slept in Joe’s bed.
More: Trending
Saturday
I’m one of those people where once I’ve had sex, I always want more.
So today, when I woke up I sent Dan a quick, “You up?” text. Thankfully he was, so we sneaked into the bathroom for a quickie.
Honestly, having two kids around is like being back with your parents. It’s all tiptoeing around and hushed voices – it sort of makes it exciting though.
Sunday
We spent today as a family with a trip to the farmer’s market then a nice dinner before the kids were in bed. It was a lovely end to another full on week.
Dan and I had a kiss and a cuddle – which inevitably led to more sofa sex. It was likely the last bit of action before next weekend – so we made it count!
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‘Having two kids around is like trying to have sex at your parents’ house’